A Special Day….

Today is a special day. It’s my little sister’s birthday. She would have been 42, if she hadn’t been killed in a car wreck when she was 19. It’s really weird for her to have been gone longer than she was with us–but this I do know–she made a huge impact in her short life and I miss her.

I think it’s normal that I remember her best around the age she was when she died even as I speculate on what she would have been like as an adult and an aunt. I think I most regret that my kids haven’t gotten to know her yet–they would have loved her and so that will be fun to witness in Heaven for sure.

Why am I posting this? Lessons learned. When the unexpected things happen in life we all have a choice–we can trust the world and it’s advice or we can trust the Father and His unfailing love to get us through. I have always respected my parents so much for the way that they have handled the difficulties of losing a child. One time my dad shared about the experience and he used the words ‘bitter’ or ‘better’ to challenge people. We will all have things we wouldn’t choose that may cause us great pain but in every situation we have the choice whether to allow it to make us bitter or better….hmm only 1 letter difference but a world apart. The choice is ours to make every time…with God we can be better..without Him we very well may become bitter.

My mom has also used her own pain to help so many others and I am so blessed to have watched both their examples of trusting God through the good and the bad. May my kids be able to same the same about me.

The other great lesson from all this for me has been to never ever take people for granted and to live with my relationships as clean and current as possible. The last time I talked to my sister we laughed and laughed about something silly and ended by saying “I love you”….is it really worth it to hold a grudge or refuse to forgive when we never know exactly how long we will have someone in our lives???

Think about it. Are you letting circumstances make you bitter or better??? Are you living with your relationships as current as possible?? It’s your choice. I really miss my sister but I am so grateful to have had the 19 years we did and also grateful for being able to have no regrets about our relationship. God is good..all the time




9 responses to “A Special Day….

  1. Thanks for giving us the challenge to be better or bitter. Kellye would be so proud of her family. It is so important to get our part right and to not have regrets.

  2. Your post hits very close to home for me. You put it so beautifully – we have a choice! To honor those we love there is really on one choice, to celebrate their life not get stuck in their death. Thank you Rachel for “being real” and sharing it all (good & bad, ups & downs) with us. Hugs!

  3. Thanks for sharing. We loved Kellye so much and so thankful for the time we had with her. Look forward to seeing her again in heaven.

  4. Pingback: Unexpected Happenings | Long Hollow Women's Ministry

  5. Rachel, how well I can relate to all that you said. Now having lost a son, my mom and dad and two sisters…your words ring out so clear and true. It IS a choice we make. And that choice does effect us in all of life. It is always the right thing to choose LIFE. Choosing to celebrate their life rather than getting stuck in their death. That’s a new phrase I’m going to use in GriefShare. Thanks for sharing…you are such a blessing!!!

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